Monday, October 11, 2010
Beth had an appointment to see what was causing the pain in the upper part of her abdomen. Her doctor was not in the office, so we saw another doctor that was on call. The doctor said that we should run some tests including a sonogram. We scheduled the sonogram for the next day and headed to the Great State Fair of Texas. We had no idea that this was to be the last “normal” day for our family.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
I never go with Beth to doctor visits that seem routine. The Spirit spoke to me very clearly that I was to go with her this time. He knew I needed to be with her.
We took the kids to school and headed for the sonogram appointment. All went well and without much incident. Until we were told to go up and see Beth’s doctor, we thought we would head back home and wait for a phone call to tell us what the sonogram showed.
Dr. Weber’s face said it all. The sonogram found something. Something bad. She immediately set up a CT scan and we found ourselves back in the imaging department. Our attitude this time around was vastly different. We were home for about twenty minutes before the doctor’s office called to inform us that Beth had been referred to a gastroenterologist who wanted to see us immediately. This doctor was in the cancer center of Baylor.
Unreal.
That word explains the rest of the week. The GI scheduled an endoscopic ultrasound in order to get a better picture of what we are dealing with as well as a biopsy. While the ultrasound and CT scan point to cancer, the EUS would tell us for certain. We would have to wait until Thursday.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
How do you pretend nothing is wrong? When your friends ask how you’re doing, how do you protect them by lying through your teeth?
“Hey, Mr. James! How’s it going?”
“Going great! How are you?” Lies. I know. Just a guy trying to make it through the day.
We let some other people from the church take care of our responsibilities there and we stayed home. Just the four of us. Knowing that our family will never be the same.
Unreal.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
The kids stayed with some friends, because our EUS was scheduled for 8:15 AM and we had to be there at 7:15. With heavy hearts, we drove to Baylor fearful yet confident that God will take care of us. My dear mother-in-law, Becky stayed beside us the whole time.
The procedure went as scheduled and while in recovery, the doctor came and told us what we feared she would. While the news was bleak, the upside was that she could see that the tumor had not spread to other organs. We had caught it early. However, it was inoperable due to its growing close to the blood vessels that supplied the rest of her organs. Not what we wanted to hear, but we still felt God’s presence as we sat there; two scared kids who didn’t know what to do next.
Unreal.
I brought Becky back to visit with her daughter and comfort her in the way only a mother can. Our fellow church staff family was outside in the waiting room. I reported what the doctor told us. Immediately, we were no longer two scared kids who did not know what to do next. We were now an army of believers determined to see this through and give God the glory.
The next few hours were spent forming a game plan. Beth, Becky, and I were going back home to tell the kids. We pulled them out of school early, and they knew right away that something was wrong. Their innocence was about to be darkened by the ugliness of this disease, and it made me mad. Mad that their mother was about to become very sick. Mad that they had to watch her go down this road.
I will never forget the conversation we had on our bed. A family of four about to take on the fight of its life. The children were perfect.
“Mommy, why are we still sitting here. We’ve got to get you to the doctor and take care of this before it gets worse!” The honesty and urgency they expressed over their concern for their sweet mother left me speechless. I was humbled by their courage and uplifted by their faith.
Unreal.
Friday, October 15, 2010
This is no time to crawl into a corner and cry. Today was about telling everyone we knew what was wrong and that it is time to get tough. The world needs to know that the James family has a fight and that we are not giving in. I spent the day at the office while the kids had a “Mommy Day” with Beth and Becky.
The love and support from our friends was overwhelming. Many came to offer words of encouragement. Others gave tearful hugs. I have never felt such love and encouragement before. People from all over the district wanted us to call on them to help with anything that needed to be done. People who do not have friends who care have to be the loneliest people on the planet. I cannot explain the feelings I had inside my heart and mind on this day. I see now why the Bible calls it the “peace that passes all understanding.” Only those who know the Lord understand. It is supernatural. It is unexplainable. It is…
Unreal.
One of the sweetest times in our lives can come when our world falls apart. When we crawl up in Jesus’ lap and peace like no other comes upon us and we know that He hears our cries and He is so big and powerful and He is our Dad and He loves us beyond belief.
Oh, Beth! God be with you and your family – may the distance that separate you now from all of us that have known you, grown with you and have been blessed by your walk with Christ, seem like no distance at all. Our God is mighty to save! Prayers are being said for you, your family and your doctors.
Dave and Beth,
I am so thankful that we can keep up with you here at this site. Your words touch me beyond belief. That peace that passes understanding is so real, but so hard to describe!
Our entire family (and you know we are getting large in numbers) is lifting you up and trusting God to meet your every need. We are so thankful to be able to be a part of this army that is asking God for a miracle. We love you and are so proud of you two for the way you are trusting the only One that can walk you through this journey.
Much love,
Bill and Lynette
Oh, Beth, I am so sorry! Our family will be praying for you!!!
I have been down this road, maybe not as far, but there is fear and there is peace co-existing. The one thing I do know is that God created us and He is in complete control. He will not leave you no matter what and He is perfect and makes no mistakes. Hold on to that! I am praying unceasingly!
I just read about your struggle on Aaron Householder’s blog. I don’t know how many mistakes there will be in the typing here because I’m not seeing so well through the tears. On Dec. 18th (soon now) I will celebrate 1 year from my surgery to remove a brain tumor. The anesthegiologist (sp) a friend of my husband, came out after surgery and explained that they were not sure that I’d be able to make it through surgery once they got in there and actually saw what we were dealing with. Hard for your loved ones to deal with. That was a Friday and on Monday I was released from the hospital! God is at work!!!!! Shortly after I started both radiology and chemo. I’m sooooooo thankful the chemo is orally instead of by infusion. Haven’t been sick at all. – just tired. My memory isn’t so great but I’ve been told that it isn’t from the brain tumor. My family was all here for the surgery -even my parents wintering in Florida. My Mom says now she’ll never fly again! They flew back on one of the worst days of our Nebraska winter! But God came through. I wanted to talk to my docs about diet and how that might be of help to me. They of course have not been trained in that. But praise God ; my sister in CA is a registered dietician working in the Scrips hospital network in San Diego. The blood clots they discovered in my leg a few days later has been more trouble than the actual cancer treatments. Coumadin – the medicine they use to thin my blood is very hard to regulate. Lincoln, NE is very blessed to have a great medical community!!!! and I’m also blessed to have a great church family who have been around me constantly after my ‘family’ all went home. My husband turned into a little mother hen which was so wonderful. I didn’t ever dream he had it in him – Guess it was really God in him working. This whole journey has been amazing! Not one I’d like to repeat though. In a way it was exciting watching God at work. I hope you have the kind of support group building that bridge to God. He is the only answer for lots of things that have happened for me. I hope @ 1 year you can be encouraged as I am. My husband and I are planning a VACATION after my last MRI test in April. then hopefully I’ll be done with chemo when that scan comes back clear as I am expecting it to. May God continue to bless you and heal you. My boys are older than your kids. 26 and married with a 9 month old girl and 24 living on his own in Ft. Collins, CO. Both about an 8 hour drive from here. My youngest had just spent 1 year in school in Australia but had been home about 1 1/2 years when all this happened. Yet another God thing. How on earth would I have been able to relay this kind of info to him otherwise. He didn’t even have a phone. He was the one who took it the hardest! My tender -hearted one. This is probably much more than you wanted to know but just be encouraged. God never sleeps. Lori Parker
David and Beth – your entire family will be in my prayers! Although I wish you didn’t have to go through this, I know God will be glorified in your fight. I look forward to seeing what He teaches you – and others – through this journey.
I am so sorry to hear about this news. My heart is saddened, but I look forward to hearing all of the amazing things God is going to do. Please know I will be praying for you guys.
Beth I have known you since you were a little girl. I will praying for you daily. I told your mom we will take care of anything she needs here while she is there to help you. I love you and will be praying for you and your family.
Dave & Beth,
I want to say thanks for setting up this blog and for the honesty. I was one of those people on Wed that saw you & you said you were just taking the night off. My heart breaks to know you were dealing with so much unknown, and I totally understand you had to keep this to yourselves. We are praying for you and will be fighting along side the James family. Love, Marcie Mills & family
Beth and Dave,
The courage and faith you have shown is uplifting (between my tears) and inspiring.
My family will pray for you continually. Thank you for sharing your life with us.
Linda Coulter and family
I’m praying for you every day.
I know God will be holding your hand all the way!
Bless you and your family
A snippit from Dr. James Dennison:… we need peace in chaotic days. We’re not the first. Travel with me back 20 centuries to join Jesus and his disciples as they row across the Sea of Galilee. Suddenly “a furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped” (Mark 4:37). The men woke Jesus, who “rebuked the wind” and shouted at the waves, “Quiet! Be still!.” Instantly “the wind died down and it was completely calm” (v. 39).
This story is in the Bible, not for those who experienced it (they would never forget it), but for us. It’s there to teach us that when your next squall comes up, the right thing to do is to go to Jesus immediately. Don’t trust your boat, or your sailing experience, or the other fishermen. Don’t accept storms as a way of life. Don’t give up on God—he’s waiting to redeem your storm for his glory and your good.
Invite Jesus to captain your boat today. Put him at its helm, calling to him as soon as storm clouds gather, settling for nothing less than his peace. And it will be yours.
Beth, You are so precious to me. You have always been so loving and sweet to my Micah. I have a large extended family and they now know who the James’ are and are praying for HIS touch on each of your lives. If you or Dave or the kids need anything, I’ll do my best to help out. I’m a great babysitter and I can cook pretty good too. I can also chaffeur with the best of them. Please call on me if I can be of any service to you. I am praying continuously for you. Love In Christ, Pam
My personal family and my church family are praying for you and your precious children.
David and Beth,
You both come to mind throughout my day and I lift you up. I am praying for the doctors as well, that they will be rested and sharp and attentive to Beth’s test results…and that God will bring to their minds the BEST treatment plan. Thank you for taking the time to share your hearts and keep us posted through this time……..
You can believe we will be praying for you and know that God is walking with you through this
Beth and Dave ,
My first ever blog…. I’m thinking of y’all and praying for y’all. I have complete cofidence in MD Anderson but most imprtantly I have complete confidence in our Lord.
I’m optimistc. It’s going to be a long road but a successful one. I love you guys and anything I can do please let me know.
Dear Beth and David,
We want to be a part of your team. Please know that we are praying for you and your family. Ann and Bill
John 11 : 4 But when Jesus heard about it he said, “The purpose of his illness is not death, but for the glory of God. I, the Son of God, will recieve glory from this situation.”
First I want to tell you….What wonderful people you both are! It saddened my heart when I heard the news, then I asked, “How could this happen to someone that loves God so much and is obedient to Him?”. The answer to me was….that the Lord allows things to happen for His reasons, whether or not we understand them, and we must remember that He is good, just, loving and merciful! Everyone’s reaction should be to trust in Him and you have a army standing with you that do! I am IN this battle with you and your family!!!!
Also, your blog is wonderful! Thank you for sharing your thoughts and giving updates on Beth’s progress. GO, FIGHT, WIN, my friends!
This is one of my favorite verses~ “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways aknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight”~Proverbs 3:5-6
I want to start of by saying} thanks for creating this blog how helpful for us the body of Christ to keep up with The James’ family story. Just like I told you Beth when I delivered those results to you, with His Stripes U are healed – Isaiah 53:5 .I believe that you will be completle healed. I love ya and we at Kaufman County Christian Center are believing that as well- we pray for you every week. Isaiah 40:31 says} They that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. May God continue to give ALL of you strength. Anything you guys need let us know we are just a call- or a text away!!! Love the Williams’ Raymond Damaris and Carli
Beth,
You probably don’t remember me, but I am Jaclyn’s mom. You and your family will be in my prayers. I have a cousin and a friend both fighting cancer and I see what wonderful things God is doing for them, and I know He will do the same for you.
David and Beth,
My heart goes out to you and your fight with cancer. We are praying for you and your family. Live strong and faithful. God is always with us. Looking forward to celebrating Victory over this.
In Him,
Tami and Ted Hull
Beth I hope you remember me. The last time I saw you, you were a senior in high school and still dating that weird brother of mine. anywanys. All my kids are teens except Bobby(who remembers you) and he is 20 now. Bob and Bobby are in Afghanistan right now and Chris will join them next month.
Mama sends me your post so I have been up to date. I am praying for you and want to send some encouraging words and a song I saw on youtube that helped me in my little battle of worry and fear taht I am going through with these deployments. I know they are not the same but the enemy uses anything to get to our faith to see if he can destroy us.
This is one of the scriptures that I cling to especially when I am facing something bad.
Isaiah 43:2 (King James Version)
2When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.
I hope it gives you a boost in your faith to keep fighting with everything that is in you because you can beat this. Just hold on to God’s unchanging hand–song– and everything will be alright. I am a Pentecostal now and this song was done by one of our pastor’s wives. It’s called Peace in the midst of the storm.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GHKsQBZH5BY&feature=related
I hope you feel the Lord by your side as He comforts you this night. Sleep in peace because God has His angels watching over you and your family
Wow. I had no Idea that your family was and is going through this. I will pray fervently for y’all. Thank you for sharing with everyone and may others be blessed through your struggle. I will also believe with you in prayer. We serve an awesome and mighty God and He is able to do exceedingly abundantly above and beyond what we could ever think, ask, or hope for. What we see is only reality, it isn’t the truth. God’s word is the truth. I encourage you to speak it over your life regularly. God bless you and keep you in His perfect peace.